Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Silence Broken...there really is a baby in there!

I can't remember the last time I posted. I know I was already starting to get sick and it felt like I was saying good-bye for awhile. I hated it. I haven't felt like myself at all this whole time. It was hard to not know what was going on with you all and I missed sharing my life too. Suddenly my life seemed too pathetic to commit to writing. Who wants to hear about how I laid on the couch all day and managed to eat a plain eggo waffle. Not exactly the motivating or even interesting fodder we normally turn to each other for. But even though not much has changed in my life, and I still get oddly car sick being on the computer, I just felt the need to reach out and see if anyone was still there!

I guess, today, the reason for all the pain in my gut, the sleepless nights, and dizziness in my every movement was brought to light. At 17 weeks and 3 days, I finally had my first apt. at the OB and I got to hear that rapid thump thumping that lets you know it isn't a really bad stomach flu. I never get very emotional at these things, but it is a relief to know I am growing a baby, not just a gut, and they are seemingly healthy. I have even been feeling it move a lot lately. Quite the mover and shaker, the nurse said. And best of all, it sounded like a girl! K, maybe not really but according to old wives tale, a fast heart beat means girl, and this one's was pumping.

I wish I could say that I am a stronger person and haven't felt sorry for myself at all during this, but then my pants would be on fire. It was hard to miss out on Thanksgiving and Christmas, not being able to eat or play like I normally do. Then there is the lack of running or biking. I miss it, and crave it at times. Hearing about all the fun others are having with it, and the plans they are making just gets me. And I miss the outside world, heck, I miss chores! But, on days when I get really down or frustrated I remember all those people working so hard to keep my family operating as smoothly as usual. My sisters and Mom have shuttled Peyton to school and therapy appointments since driving makes me too sick. Erica even rescues me some mornings and takes the boys so I can try to get some of my missed sleep. Our church is even bringing Jesse meals once a week so he gets some nutrition.

But, my biggest hero right now is my Track Coach, my best friend, my husband, Jesse. That poor guy has been working himself to the bone. He comes home after a full day at work then cooks, cleans, folds laundry, takes care of the boys, and tries to make me as comfortable as possible. I know he must be exhausted, but he doesn't complain. It's only recently that he has even had time to start working out again. I love him and I will try to repay him with a really cute baby.

So, this was much longer then intended and I feel like I still have a lot to say which surprises me. I thought I was tapped out, but most of it is like this, random spouting. Nothing concrete or useful. More for myself and historical record than anything. Sorry. I will try to return with full gusto soon. Eventually, this carsick feeling will pass and I hope to hit, at least the treadmill, soon. Hope you all are well, and I miss you so! Thank you so much to those of you who have sent such sweet emails checking up on us and for thinking of us. You don't know how much it has helped me over these last months!

Adorable Rounded Belly Wife (Tressa)

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry you are having such a rough time! But I am very happy you have so much support! And hey CONGRATS! I'm keeping my fingers crossed for a girl ; ) Remember, you are stronger than you know! Praying the hard part is over soon!

Pahla said...

Glad you're still alive!! Hopefully, you'll be feeling better soon, you've been missed!

misszippy said...

Sorry you are having such a tough go with it. I hope it's only a temporary phase and that soon you'll get some relief. It will all be worth it in the end!

Diana Tries-A-Tri! said...

So glad to hear from you again! Sorry things are not going too easy but it sounds like you have an amazing support system keeping you going! And I'm sure you're going to have an adorable baby (girl)!

Laurie said...

Good to hear from you, sorry to hear it has been so incredibly rough. Hang in there, the time will pass sort of quickly and then you'll have a beautiful little baby to... keep you up all night, and spit up everywhere and... oops, I mean to cuddle and love. :) It will be worth it.

Rae said...

Tessa! What a great surprise to hear from you! I am sorry you've been so sick. :( But keep hanging in there...it's for wonderful reasons. So are you going to find out what you're having or wait for the surprise at the end? You'll have to post an adorable pic of you soon so we can see you in your preggo glory! Thanks for the update!

imemary said...

Ah yes, the pulling-your-car-over-to-throw-up, crossing-your-legs-while-you-retch, today-I-can-only-eat-cake-and-kimchi stage. I wish you the best of luck.

Allison said...

What a great surprise in my google reader this morning!!!

Hope you feel better soon and i am so sorry you are having such a rough time.

Thoughts and prayers to you and your family!

Stacie said...

You know that my whole gang here loves you. Call us anytime night or day. Life is crazy busy most of the time but I'll be there any time you need me. You know that I miss you. It was awesome experiencing my first TRI with you and running the You Go Girl 10K was a ton of fun. I'll be praying that the rest of your pregnancy goes smoothly and you'll feel better soon so you can at least use your treadmill. I'm also going to be keeping my fingers crossed for a girl :)

Mel -Tall Mom on the Run said...

Hang in there buddy!! so glad you have a great support system. I cannot imagine having such a hard pregnancy..

Shellyrm ~ just a country runner said...

I wish you were not having such a challenging time. Luckily you seem to have a wonderful support system in your friends and family! Just remember that nothing is ever gained of value following the easy path. You are being made into an even stronger person, wife, friend and mommy!
You are at an enviable time in life. Rejoice and savor every moment of it for this shall (too) quickly pass. Breathe it all in!

Jess @ Blonde Ponytail said...

I hope you continue to feel better! Can't wait to se a cute rounded belly picture!!

Unknown said...

So glad to hear from you --- I've been thinking about you guys. Sounds like it's been tough, but I'm glad that he/she sounds good! Hang in there momma!

Tortuga_Runner said...

Welcome back! Hope you and baby have a happy healthy pregnancy.

Average Woman Runner said...

So glad to hear from you sweetie Tressa! I hope you are through the worst of it and that you get that lovely energy burst through your 2nd & part of your 3rd trimesters. Take care of yourself, get some rest, and get some fresh air when you can :)

Julie D. said...

hang in there, Tressa! You are missed and you will be back. Now keep cooking that baby! :)

5 Miles Past Empty said...

Wow oh wow!! Hang in there! Thank goodness for all the support you have!! Can't wait for another update!!